Addiction Treatment Program Alumni Letters

Letters of Hope and Recovery

September 6th, 2005

My name is Lorie and I am a Counselor Intern at Starlite Facility in Centerpoint, Texas. I would like to share a little bit of my history with you and how in my journey I was brought to the top of a Hill overlooking a river.

I am 28 years old, and 27 years ago my parents were both killed by a drunk driver 10 miles from home. They were 2 of 7 killed that night. My father played in a band, and my mother was accompanying them. The story that was told to me by my maternal grandparents goes like this. I was 10 months old, and the only child of Wally and Becky. My grandparents had also gone to see my father play, (he was a drummer and song writer, and also had recorded a few records, or 8 tracks at that time). They decided to leave early, and as they were about to board that old 70 something Ford, when my father walked out with me in his arms, and asked my grandfather to take me home since they would be staying late. My grandmother would tell me that an angel put me in their arms that night.

At around 2:30 in the morning on April 2, 1978, my mother, father, and his 4 band members were driving home. A drunk driver was coming around the corner and hit their van head on. There was an explosion and everyone, except the drunk driver, died instantly. He was thrown from the vehicle and died 3 days later from severe burns. I think I am blessed to have survived and be raised by the two most loving grandparents, "parents" for 20 years of my life. They passed when I was 19 and 20, and are reunited with their only daughter in heaven. For quite a few years, probably late teens to early twenties, I hadn't thought that. In my mind, I was the victim. I was the one left an orphan and dealt a bad hand by God.

I began drinking with my friends in high school, started staying out late, not going to school, etc. I eventually quit school and got my GED when I was a senior. Thereafter, my drinking just continued, but through it all I had reasons to drink. My life was just a down ward spiral, and I was hurting and taking every one who loved me down with me. There were many times I wanted to die, but because I was raised Catholic, I believed that if I killed myself then I would never be able to see my family again. Then, a day come along when I was 23, almost 24, that I realized that God responded to my cries. I found out that I was expecting a child, and that put the brakes on my drinking immediately.

My son was born and I feel that God had given me exactly what I needed to continue to live. He is now 3 1/2 and by the way, thinks he's a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. Through some trials, and tribulations I returned to school and entered into a LCDC program. I had never thought in my entire life that this is where my path was leading. I completed the program and when I was looking for a place for my internship, my instructor told me about two places in the Hill Country, Starlite, and "the other one up the road". Because I was working part-time, and still considered a student, I didn't have money to afford an apartment, so me and my son stayed with an aunt. Because I was financially challenged, I never thought I would be able to have enough gas money to come interview, let alone move to another town, that I had never seen before.

Again, God was working in my life. I still can't explain the outpour, but I was able to meet Mr. Kirk Kureska, Administrator, who by the way almost made me cry during the interview, but nonetheless offered me this wonderful opportunity. So, me and my 3 year old turtle packed our bags and moved to the hills the day after Thanksgiving 2004. I have many things to be thankful for today. I am continually blessed by the staff here at Starlite, from Kirk, Brian, our Clinical Director, and all the counselors, nurses, techs, housekeeping, and maintenance who always fix things that happen to "accidentally" break (this is not an admission of guilt). And, of course, there are the patients. Many clients come wanting to die, and leave wanting to live.

Somewhere along this 30 day program miracles are happening. From a client feeling the loss of his loved one for the first time in many years, sober...to the client being able to see that no matter how defiant and defensive he may be, we are all here, unwavering. This is not an easy task to live day in and day out in the world of alcoholics and addicts who come here, but it is an honor.

June 3, 2005

I wanted to share with you how Starlite has affected my life.

I last attended Starlite in April of 2002. I had been attending A.A. for 2 years prior to that. However for most of that time I didn't get a sponsor and I wasn't working the steps. I am proof that just sitting in the rooms of AA isn't enough. When I came to rehab in 2002, I was desperate to be sober. I spent every spare moment reading the Big Book, working the steps and reconnecting with God.

I had a strong relationship with God since I was a teenager, but when my life spiraled out of control with alcohol, I pushed him away. When I returned home from Starlite in May I found a wonderful sponsor who was tough on me when I needed it but loved me through my weak periods.

I have a debilitating, chronic pain disorder (Fibromyalgia) and go through times when I can't make daily meetings due to pain and spasms. The one think that I know is that my God knows this won't expect more of me than I can do. I spend a lot of time reading the Big Book and keep in touch with my sponsor by phone. God has used me many times to share about my alcoholism and the program of recovery through A.A. with non-alcoholics that I come in contact with. I guess it's no surprise, but so many people still don't understand alcoholism as a disease and some have negative ideas about A.A.

God has helped me through the process of repairing my badly deteriorated marriage. Even three years after rehab, this is still an on-going process. But my husband doe now understand the disease concept. I will never forget the time he told someone at an A.A. meeting (he loves birthday nights) that he couldn't understand why I didn't stop drinking because he had asked me to stop. It is truly a miracle that we are still together and in May we celebrated 34 years of marriage.

I have been blessed to see all of the promises of A.A. program fulfilled in my life. I thank God daily for the program and for the work He did in my life through Starlite Recovery.

Thank you,
Gaye

June 2, 2005

To everyone at Starlite

I cannot thank you enough for the difference you have made in the life of our family. My husband returned home December 4th a new man. Life has been a roller coaster since he got home but the highs and lows are definitely leveling out. He has celebrated 6 months of sobriety. I am deeply grateful to you all and so is John.

I was impressed with each and every person on staff that we came in contact with, starting with the person who checked John in. I know she has gone through the drill with hundreds, maybe thousands of people but I sensed her genuine concern for us. Everyone was so gracious. When I came for family weekend, my confidence in the staff just grew even more. I knew that John was in the best of hands. We were in crisis that weekend but Eddie got everything back on track. I was extremely impressed by everyone who taught us that weekend. It was obvious that their expertise came from experience and not from a book.

I am also very proud of my husband. He worked hard while he was there. He gutted out the 4th Step with extreme difficulty. He experienced a miracle wit the person that went through the 5th Step with him. He was physically, emotionally and spiritually healed by releasing his anger in the letter he burned and left there. When he called me the next day I KNEW. For the first time, I could tell he was changed, permanently. I could hear it in his voice. Until that moment I only hoped.

As you all could probably expect, we still had a hard road ahead when he got home. I realized he wasn't perfect. And he realized he wasn't perfect. One day at a time we have worked through our challenges and grown closer.

When John decided to go to Rehab, my biggest question was "But will it work for HIM?". Thankfully my prayers were answered.

Thank you Pat, Eddie, and everyone else. I am sorry I don't remember everyone's name. Believe me I remember each of your hearts.

Gratefully,
Lana

April 17, 2005

Howdy everyone,

I was thinking about something to write regarding my recovery and it dawned on me that I was thinking. That in itself is progress for me. Since I left "Starlite Rehab 04", life has been trying, yet each day I awaken and I can feel. I feel love, pain, joy and sadness and its' such a wonderful change in payer, readings, or whatever. My emotional and intellectual growth have sky rocketed since I left in September of 2004 / I'm back in college and should be heading back to Texas A&M University, in College Station, to complete my junior year as a Pre-Med student after one last semester at Navarro College. Starlite has made me the person I am today, and that person I love!

Natalie